Why are men so bad at chat up lines?

[Bubbles]

Ok, I get chatted up alot, it can be very flattering but most of the time just hideous! I've had all the classics such as: -
What you doing later?
Do you come here often?
Can I walk you home?

I've even had some pretty unususl lines, such as: -
Can I try your top on?
If we dance, can I grab your ass?
You have a very symetrical face!

And how can I forget such poor attempts like: -
You have great jugs!
You seem really nice!

I ask because I recieved the most horendously bad line this weekend. I was subtley trying to get rid of this guy because I really wasn't interested, so I told him all of the bad things about me. (He was basically trying to get me to go home with him) So I say "Oh I need a really good wax" (who like's hairy women I was thinking) This was the responce I recieved, "Oh i'll use my teeth and bite it all off", this then was proceeded by several munching sounds and a yum, yum, yum, yum! I couldn't say anything after this and just stared in dis-belief.

Come on guys, what's going on in those heads of yours? I can laugh at it but good lord! I also want to hear any other bad chat up lines.

XX

[Nybarius]

I think you're making all of this up to gain NF popularity.

Nobody chats you up, admit it.

[Shishou]

Ya know they call me Moses. Drop your pants, and I'll show you how I parted the Red Sea.

[Nybarius]

Ya know they call me Moses. Drop your pants, and I'll show you how I parted the Red Sea.

Tastiest time of the month, eh?

[Shishou]

Tastiest time of the month, eh?

You've made me realize how sick that is. Now I'm sayd.

[Nybarius]

Hint: Moses didn't use his tongue to part the red sea.

Venture Brothers: "One woman servicing all those guys? She'd be in estrous all the time! I'm telling you, Smurfs aren't mammals!"

[Raistlin-sama]

Well, who cares?

Small-talk is boring as hell anyways, and not something I usually feel the need to engage in.

As for the content of your post, well I have never used any pick-up line, and have no valid opinion about it.

[Jackal Iscariot]

.................. :oh

[Bubbles]

I think you're making all of this up to gain NF popularity.

Nobody chats you up, admit it.

I only wish I was making it up but think about it how could anyone come up with that?

XX

[sonnie_skies]

...well. after reading posts 2-6, I've concluded that men are stupid ...okay, men are stupid.

seriously, though, guys don't think before they talk. they just think if they impress a girl things will end up with them having sex. i mean, i've heard some dumb lines myself and it's made me realize that they really have no idea what they sound like.

[Nybarius]

How's this for a pickup line:

"You look like a lonely anime nerd who's liable to pass on any offers she gets from perfectly fine gentleman, go and laugh about them online, and spend the rest of her life alone and miserable, all the while wondering why"?

By the way, my favorite pickup line is "Hi"

[Bubbles]

Well, who cares?

Small-talk is boring as hell anyways, and not something I usually feel the need to engage in.

As for the content of your post, well I have never used any pick-up line, and have no valid opinion about it.

I'm not saying it bothers me, i'm mearly asking why are they so bad? With out chat up lines life would be a little more dull.

XX

[Nybarius]

By the way, let me explain why my reaction to this thread is so hostile.

This thread is little more than an excuse to bash men. And, most likely, it's stuff you're just making up for attention. Even if it were true (I have my doubts), it's still no excuse for sexism.

[x_Zen_x]

By the way, let me explain why my reaction to this thread is so hostile.

This thread is little more than an excuse to bash men. And, most likely, it's stuff you're just making up for attention. Even if it were true (I have my doubts), it's still no excuse for sexism.


I heard that.
Well what do you want guys to say ? hey lets have sex? you gotta start from stage 1 pshhh.

[CrazyMoronX]

Similar thing happened to me at church a couple weeks back. A girl came up to me and say "Hi how you doin?" and after I said "good, how are you?" and walked away, I was like "what kind of pickup line was that?!?"

She was relatively attractive, but still... Women suck at pick up... err chat up lines.

[Nybarius]

Similar thing happened to me at church a couple weeks back. A girl came up to me and say "Hi how you doin?" and after I said "good, how are you?" and walked away, I was like "what kind of pickup line was that?!?"

She was relatively attractive, but still... Women suck at pick up... err chat up lines.

Yeah, one time, after I took this girl's virginity, she was all trying to snuggle with me and shit. What a loser!

[Jackal Iscariot]

Yeah, one time, after I took this girl's virginity, she was all trying to snuggle with me and shit. What a loser!
I would have bitch-slaped her if I was you. :oh
ps: Oh comon, Im Jackal ffs.. I'm a natural born uke. FUCK YOU if ya believed me XD

[Nybarius]

I would have bitch-slaped her if I was you. :oh


I ended up locking her in an abandoned outdoor oven and moseying off :0

[Hef]

I ended up locking her in an abandoned outdoor oven and moseying off :0
You didn't stun her and tie her naked into a tree? :-(

WHY NOT? :crying

[xeleron]

I always start my conversation with: "Hey, whats happening, wazup.. etc ete.." :P Hopefully, that he/she will tell me what has been going on recently in their lifes.

Or maybe:
"Hey babe, I am going to protect you for life!" :wink GAIII SEN SEIIIIII

[Danchou]

I never use pick up lines, but hell i never pick any one up either.

[Zhongda]

I think you're making all of this up to gain NF popularity.

Nobody chats you up, admit it.
XD

in the words of the gr8 moe:
that was pawnage in it's most powerfull form

*reps*

Edit
..on second thought.. that wasn't really that funny :oh.. i should go sleep xS

[rimpelcut]

why are girls so bad at sedusing these days...

[Jedi Mind Tricks]

Ok, I get chatted up alot, it can be very flattering but most of the time just hideous! I've had all the classics such as: -
What you doing later?
Do you come here often?
Can I walk you home?

I've even had some pretty unususl lines, such as: -
Can I try your top on?
If we dance, can I grab your ass?
You have a very symetrical face!

And how can I forget such poor attempts like: -
You have great jugs!
You seem really nice!

I ask because I recieved the most horendously bad line this weekend. I was subtley trying to get rid of this guy because I really wasn't interested, so I told him all of the bad things about me. (He was basically trying to get me to go home with him) So I say "Oh I need a really good wax" (who like's hairy women I was thinking) This was the responce I recieved, "Oh i'll use my teeth and bite it all off", this then was proceeded by several munching sounds and a yum, yum, yum, yum! I couldn't say anything after this and just stared in dis-belief.

Come on guys, what's going on in those heads of yours? I can laugh at it but good lord! I also want to hear any other bad chat up lines.

XX

Oh elementary my dear ‘bubblishous’. You see, the men that ask you out are desperate and can’t get any “action” from an attractive member of the opposite sex. So they basically go for the next best thing, you.

I'll describe the intriguing process to you.
You see, as these desperate men approach the wilder beast (you), despite the need for pleasure; they subconsciously avoid getting intimate with you by saying vulgar comments, such as the hair one you mentioned.
It’s a defence mechanism for humans to avoid breeding with beasts.

Evolution they call it.

[RAGING BONER]

for fucks sake! half way through the thread and i'm thinking were talking about some kind of phone sex hotline that horny perverted losers use to awkwardly interact with one another.

its called a PICK-UP LINE!!!!!!! damn brits.

*ahem*

that slight annoyance aside...i usually don't have to use ridiculous lies or fake ass declarations of a womans beauty to pick up a chik (although i prefer to lie, must be genetically incoded into male DNA) since i can usually spot right away which ones are interested and which ones aren't. all in all, i much prefer when they approach me because it saves me a HELL OF A LOT of time. when you are appoached you don't really have to bother to get to know each other too well...as opposed to you doing the "pick-up" were you have to sit and talk shit with a person your not really interested in talking too, just screwing for a while and never seeing again.

sometimes if i'm bored at a party however, i will choose to annoy the hell out of a woman until she breaks down and gives me her number...then i just blow my nose with it or something.

yes i'm strange and i have a cruel streak.

[Dionysus]

There was a time when people had conversations, and, if they liked eachother, they'd spend more time together. What is it you are expecting, exactly? Perhaps you can be a part of the solution.

[RAGING BONER]

There was a time when people had conversations, and, if they liked eachother, they'd spend more time together. What is it you are expecting, exactly? Perhaps you can be a part of the solution.
i'm thinking we set back the clock to even MORE traditional times...

We club the bitch we like and drag her by the hair back to our love cave. when we tire of them we burn them at the stake.

[sasuke_limays]

haiya....why hah....
all of you wnt to blame the mens....

[DragonHeart52]

Ok, I get chatted up alot, it can be very flattering but most of the time just hideous! I've had all the classics such as: -
What you doing later?
Do you come here often?
Can I walk you home?

I've even had some pretty unususl lines, such as: -
Can I try your top on?
If we dance, can I grab your ass?
You have a very symetrical face!

And how can I forget such poor attempts like: -
You have great jugs!
You seem really nice!

I ask because I recieved the most horendously bad line this weekend. I was subtley trying to get rid of this guy because I really wasn't interested, so I told him all of the bad things about me. (He was basically trying to get me to go home with him) So I say "Oh I need a really good wax" (who like's hairy women I was thinking) This was the responce I recieved, "Oh i'll use my teeth and bite it all off", this then was proceeded by several munching sounds and a yum, yum, yum, yum! I couldn't say anything after this and just stared in dis-belief.

Come on guys, what's going on in those heads of yours? I can laugh at it but good lord! I also want to hear any other bad chat up lines.

XX

This whole topic of pick-up lines has been done to death before and personally, I find the idea of making fun of people who are just trying to break the ice a bit on the egotistical side. Why not give us a few examples of lines that you would use to impress a guy and let the men of NF rate your skills at engaging the opposite sex?

As far as the "hairy in need of a waxing exchange", you asked for that one. If you don't like being treated like a piece of meat, stay out of the marketplace. Otherwise, don't complain and demean someone because they aren't up to your standards. It's a risk you run in the places you frequent.

I think you're making all of this up to gain NF popularity.

Nobody chats you up, admit it.

:oh I trust your insight, oh great one.

[Bubbles]

Man, what an ear pounding i've got for this thread. I thought it'd be a laugh but hey obviously not. I can't be arsed!

XX

[Dionysus]

Man, what an ear pounding i've got for this thread. I thought it'd be a laugh but hey obviously not. I can't be arsed!

XX
Obviously many guys in here find this a touchy subject. :amuse

[Shishou]

You have the most beutiful lips. The lips between your hips!

[Bubbles]

You have the most beutiful lips. The lips between your hips!
Is that the line you use? How beautiful!

XX

[Dionysus]

*rubs his face*

Just clearing a place for you to sit.

[Bubbles]

*rubs his face*

Just clearing a place for you to sit.

Gross! Why are woman so much worse at coming up with lines like that? I'm actually a writer so I'd say I have a good imagination but......nothing.

XXX

[Dionysus]

Gross! Why are woman so much worse at coming up with lines like that? I'm actually a writer so I'd say I have a good imagination but......nothing.

XXX
You can only write what you know. Do you know men well enough to think like one? Hell, that's not to say women can't think with a dirty spin on their own.

I take it you don't write erotica. :wink

[Bubbles]

You can only write what you know. Do you know men well enough to think like one? Hell, that's not to say women can't think with a dirty spin on their own.

I take it you don't write erotica. :wink

Unfortunatly not, I would be minted if I had though. No I don't think I have a dirty mind i'm actually pretty shy.

XX

[Dionysus]

Unfortunatly not, I would be minted if I had though. No I don't think I have a dirty mind i'm actually pretty shy.

I'm not the best around tangible women I don't know, but this is the internets! I'm able to write with impunity! :tem

Though, once I know someone, I'll say anything to them. Or if I don't know them, I'll say anything after a few drinks. :amuse

[Shishou]

Is that the line you use? How beautiful!

XX

I always figure it is best to start with a compliment.

[Bubbles]

I always figure it is best to start with a compliment.
As with you 'gays' thread you entertain me Shishou. You clearly have no shame, I'm glad you feel you win in life for getting a smooch.

XX

[roguenoir]

Just go up to a girl and ask her if she wants to kiss you. Probably works a litte better than most "classic" pickup lines, at least on the street.

[haunted]

What happened to the chloroform rag? I was waiting for someone to throw it in.

[mUcHo LoCo]

well u cant really stop em, try being bitchier and they mite avoid using really bad pickup lines

[Beren]

Here are some hella funny pick up lines (not mine) which some u might have seen before:

Guy *quickly says*: That shirt is very becoming on u!
Girl: What?
Guy: Well, if I were on u, I'd be cumming too! smile-big

Guy: Ur like my pokemon, all I wanna do is pikachu (peek-at-u)

Guy: My watch says ur not wearing any underwear. *looks at invisible watch*
Girl: Wtf?
Guy: O wait, my watch is 15 minutes fast

Guy: There is a mirror in my pocket and I can see u in my pants

Guy: Do u like role playing? *pauses* We can do midget boxing! get on ur knees and give me a blow!!! :wink

Not that any of these would work...

[blacklusterseph004]

Damn Beren, those are pretty bad...

[Byakugan style]

Ok,

I know it sounds corny, but it's actually pretty funny. I mean, if you see stuff like: "Gun DAM you FINE", you must admit it's hilarious . Or is it just me and my weird humor?

Anyway, this is taken from >Nozomi Online<, found it while digging for news stories.

Enjoy.


The Top 20 Worst Anime Pick Up Lines

20. STD’s are like Pokemon baby, gotta catch ‘em all!

19. Gun DAM girl you FINE.

18. I lost my number while fighting an interplanetary menace, can I have yours?

17. Why don’t we go back to my place and find my Dragonballs?

16. I was just checking you out from across the room with my Sharingan. I came over because I notice your chakra use is limited, and well let’s just say I really know how to get your chakra flowing.

15. You must be tired, because I was left my dating sim on in my Playstation all night.

14. You make Princess Peach look like Bowser.

13. Excuse me, is your name Hina? Because I think I’m in love.

12. I’m having the urge to grow several penis tentacles.

11. There’s enough Ai in Jailbait for the both of us.

10. I fell in love with you ever since I looked up your skirt.

9. Would you like to see my Power Ranger?

8. If you go out with me, I’ll treat you how I treat my Pocky. I’ll spend a lot of money on you, bring you home and finish you off within 5 minutes before I lay in bed crying myself to sleep.

7. Ah~! My Goddess.

6. If there was a hentai based on you, I’d buy it.

5. Excuse me, do you know bukkake?

4. Do you have a tampon I can put in my nostril? Because my nose started bleeding when I saw you.

3. Let’s find a quiet place to connect and form Voltron.

2. Sometimes my friends call me Speed Racer, because adventure’s always waiting just a head.

1. I promise, I can always find a girls G-Force.

[kire]

haha those are good ones...I guess im lucky i havent heard anything weird from people, if i did i forgot..most of the poeple who have aske me out have all been really kind people...I guess the worst one was i want to take you dancing...i was like [I]uh-huh[I] I could tell by the look in his eyes he wanted to get into my pants...I may have been really young but was never STUPID! he was like 4 years older than me, haha he thought i would fall for that..baka he didnt even get under my shirt, with a lie like that...lol
~All in all i guess guys say things like that because they are overconfident, or they get advice from other guys who dont know what they are doing...

[Bubbles]

Whoa, who has brought my thread back to life?

Well thank you, I feel it is still a matter worth discussing. Byakugan Style those lines are really funny.:laugh

XX

[lekki]

Greatest pick up lines include:
Your skin's so soft, wanna hook-up?

Wearing a shirt that says 'sleeps well with others' and then walking around the bar pointing at the shirt whenever you see a girl you like.

And finally, "You know what they say? Big hands, big ... Wanna find out if it's true?"

I hear girls hate pick-up lines in general and just want the man to be real.
Problem is the girls always make the situations so tense. Or rather, the men put too much pressure on themselves.

Either way, goodluck out there.

[Byakugan style]

No problem Bubblishous glad to be I've been showing them to every one I know!

My personal fave is 19. Gun DAM girl you FINE.

I wonder if anyone will start to uses these!?!? well good luck gentlemen in finding a girl who'll won't hit or walk out after hearing these!

[Paracetamol Boy]

Men = lack subtlely.

[batanga]

Bloodninja knows this stuff better than everyone.

[Guest]

I like the one, "ohh, my boner..."

[Hangatýr]

We're not, women just blow at understanding them.

[jkingler]

When it comes to verbal pickups, both sexes suck.

When it comes to non-verbal pickups, women have definite advantages. :oh

[Hangatýr]

Hey, atleast we can have a flag blowing in the wind, anywhere we want. :oh

[Orochimaru]

I think you're making all of this up to gain NF popularity.

Nobody chats you up, admit it.

Haha Nybarius .. You didn't have to burst her bubble that early in the thread! :laugh

[Guest]

Gotta put em' down quick....

[Obsessor]

By the way, let me explain why my reaction to this thread is so hostile.

This thread is little more than an excuse to bash men. And, most likely, it's stuff you're just making up for attention. Even if it were true (I have my doubts), it's still no excuse for sexism.

'Nough said... :oh

[Mind]

Agreed.

When it comes to verbal pickups, both sexes suck.

When it comes to non-verbal pickups, women have definite advantages. :oh


Hmmm..."Ichiraku Philosophical Forum"?

:)...yet I'm naturally drawn to the less intellectual and thought demanding thread...much amusement supplied already.

Think someone previously mentioned how present day social pressures and expectancies have gone overboard and skewed how social interaction is taking place. Doesn't help that linguistic skills are perhaps not as they once were. *Looks at keyboard*