Kimimaro + Sasori vs France [Archive]

CrazyMoronX

11-28-2005, 01:42 PM

Say Kimimaro and Sasori teamed up (don't ask me why) and decided to conquer France (because they love wine, and hairy women).

Without the use of nuclear devices, could France kill Sasori and Kimimaro, or will they be crushed under the wood and bone duo's migh?

chauronity

11-28-2005, 01:44 PM

Tanks = Kill for puppets. Not to speak of cruise missiles and other tools of modern warfare, even guns.
No luck for Kimi atleast.

France takes this.

ydraliskos

11-28-2005, 01:45 PM

There is no precedent of France winning against ....anyone.. So I'd give it to Sasori and Kimii.

jkingler

11-28-2005, 01:51 PM

Spine swords > Surrendering simians.

Unless France is able to recruit an army of enraged Pokemon, they stand no chance.

Jeltz

11-28-2005, 02:01 PM

There is no precedent of France winning against ....anyone.. So I'd give it to Sasori and Kimii.

Old joke that is not related much to reality. France has historically been one of Europe's major powers and they did most of the fighting for the Entente on the Western front in WW1.

The reason I care about the French war jokes is that I have seen far too many of them. And almost all of them totally ignore all historical facts. Like that French military vicories site that made up their own alternate history. It would have been more fun if they had used some clever twists instead to make it seem like France has lsot all their wars.

Modern arms wins over two Naruto ninjas.

Shogun

11-28-2005, 02:03 PM

yeah jeltz, just like all the fighting sweden did in the world wars, kimimaro and danna take it!

Jeltz

11-28-2005, 02:06 PM

yeah jeltz, just like all the fighting sweden did in the world wars, kimimaro and danna take it!

Do I detect sarcasm here? :)

But seriosuly, France did most of the fighting for the Entente in WW1 and quite little in WW2 (some of France was even allied with Germany). Sweden wasn't officially involved in either of the wars. Sweden hasn't had any military history since the napoleonic wars.

ydraliskos

11-28-2005, 02:06 PM

Old joke that is not related much to reality. France has historically been one of Europe's major powers and they did most of the fighting for the Entente on the Western front in WW1.

The reason I care about the French war jokes is that I have seen far too many of them. And almost all of them totally ignore all historical facts. Like that French military vicories site that made up their own alternate history. It would have been more fun if they had used some clever twists instead to make it seem like France has lsot all their wars.

Modern arms wins over two Naruto ninjas.

It's not really a joke, more like an internet thing, like "lol" and "owned" abbreviations. Didn't even say it to be funny, it just had to be said. This is the internet, and a post where france fights someone. It's just traditional.

Manji Yoshimitsu

11-28-2005, 02:06 PM

Muahahaaha

Kimimaro!

Rice Ball

11-28-2005, 02:07 PM

french military victories! (http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/text/victories.html)

Old but gold :)

Jeltz

11-28-2005, 02:09 PM

It's not really a joke, more like an internet thing, like "lol" and "owned" abbreviations. Didn't even say it to be funny, it just had to be said. This is the internet, and a post where france fights someone. It's just traditional.

Hmm, maybe my problem is that I have always taken it for an attempt at a joke. Maybe it is just like "McGuyver > all" and other silly things.

Lucifer

11-28-2005, 03:19 PM

fucking this is joke thread, obviously... Kimi and Sasori for victory? <<roflmao...

French Army have millions military...and also TANK....wait...

remember? Eiffel Tower !!!! obviously,
Eiffel Tower is a secret special weapon... do you play from Aero Fighter??...

EIFFEL PWNED Kimi and Sasori...

I voted for SIEGHEIL.... so sh!t nazi rulez..

Seany

11-28-2005, 03:21 PM

Well sasori took over a country with his puppets and kimimaro is unbeatable!! so these two win:amuse

martryn

11-28-2005, 03:28 PM

Do the French get an English men to lead them? Do they have access to the Foreign Legion? They'd win if they do, lose if they don't.

CrazyMoronX

11-28-2005, 04:09 PM

What if Sasori disguises his puppets as muslims, and slowly burns France to the ground?

Raistlin-sama

11-28-2005, 04:16 PM

Germany resurrects Hitler, and kills us all, WAHH!

I mean, come on it's so obvious that this will be the outcome of such an event. Resurrected Hitler will have vampiric power by the way (of the tough kind, think Alucard). Why? Because I say so.

The Lazy Shadow

11-28-2005, 05:06 PM

I don't know I think Hitler has this one lol

Dyroness

11-28-2005, 05:10 PM

Sasori will kill them all after giving a speech on how his art is much better than France's.

anbutofu

11-28-2005, 05:11 PM

which french?
monty python french > kimi + sasori - flying farm animals for the win!
"historical" french < kimi + sasori - not a chance,
modern day french < kimi + sasori - refer to crazymoronx's post, they have the firepower, manpower and skill to, but w/o the ok from the govt it doesnt matter.
fictional france > kimi + sasori - how the heck can anyone beat asterix(he defeated the roman empire!), leon(the professional) and the scarlet pimpernnel?!?!

kumagoro_usagi

11-28-2005, 05:13 PM

which french?

Or to be more to the point, does this include French Canadians:huh? If so, Kimi and Sasori will really be overpowered.

martryn

11-28-2005, 05:17 PM

leon(the professional)

Leon was from like Russia or something from that movie, wasn't he?

NineG

11-28-2005, 05:42 PM

Kimi and Sasori cause i have trouble speaking the french language
<< lame excuse ey ?

Jikoo

11-28-2005, 05:46 PM

One french man with a rifle, kills silly ninjas. Sorry but that's the way it is.

anbutofu

11-28-2005, 05:49 PM

just checked wikipedia says its just his code name, supposed to be italian it says. oh well the french lose now =p

Lucifer

11-28-2005, 06:29 PM

oh... Asterix and Obelix are vikings, isn't french...
well, Jean Reno plays Léon... he'd die to suicide... so pro a bit...
Noir are french characters Mireille Bouquet, Kirika Yuumara (she is japanese live in france), Chole, etc... <<< she all pro...
Gundam series already who's french pilot...
and Utena is a french, right?

http://photos1.blogger.com/img/130/1270/1024/marimix.jpg

others I dunno..

Gunners

11-28-2005, 06:36 PM

A well placed nuke would take the duo out.

Arilou

11-28-2005, 07:12 PM

There is no precedent of France winning against ....anyone.. So I'd give it to Sasori and Kimii.

People at one point or another beaten by the french:
Roman Empire
Abbasid Caliphate (Tours)
England (100-years war, American War of Independence)
Spain (30-years war, some of the Italian Wars)
Austria (30-years war, War of the X Coalitions, Revolutionary Wars)
Seljuk Turks (First Crusade, the leader was french)

European history from the 15th to the 19th century basically followed a pattern, France started beating people, then ALL of Europe ganged up and managed to get a stalemate. Seriously, France was the 300-pound gorilla.

CrazyMoronX

11-28-2005, 07:53 PM

One french man with a rifle, kills silly ninjas. Sorry but that's the way it is.

He better have knowledge on how to kill Sasori.

He better also be using armor peircing rounds, and if Kimimaro really tried, he better be using tank peircing projectiles.

RAGING BONER

11-28-2005, 07:53 PM

France would give up.

Last of the Uchihas

11-28-2005, 08:01 PM

France wins easily.

Just put Sasori and Kimimaro on American clothes and flags, and the French would beat the shit out of them .:amuse

Devilguy

11-28-2005, 08:06 PM

Copinator, you understand the French's mentality!:P
But personnally I give it to Kimi alone. Because he has a spine whereas most French don't...:amuse

Last of the Uchihas

11-28-2005, 08:09 PM

Copinator, you understand the French's mentality!:P

lol, I have been to France :P

But personnally I give it to Kimi alone. Because he has a spine whereas most French don't...:amuse

lmao, how can you say that!!!! :amuse

Blitzomaru

11-28-2005, 10:27 PM

A team of pre-chuuni exam Ino, sakura, TenTen and Hianta could beat the french. Heck, Konohamaru's squad might be able to beat the french.

Arilou

11-29-2005, 03:36 AM

The French beat Godzilla.
See?

Chamcham Trigger

11-29-2005, 04:17 AM

I say France wins due to alliances. If France is attacked, then allies will jump in to help them :D.

Quoll

11-29-2005, 05:58 AM

There is no precedent of France winning against ....anyone.. So I'd give it to Sasori and Kimii.

It would be more correct to say there is no precedent for France staying in a fight. France loses.

Arilou

11-29-2005, 06:00 AM

It would be more correct to say there is no precedent for France staying in a fight. France loses.

...Dude.
The french beat Godzilla.

Also, I'd just quote a certain napoleonic general when he was asked to surrender:
"Merde!"

Quoll

11-29-2005, 06:33 AM

...Dude.
The french beat Godzilla.

Also, I'd just quote a certain napoleonic general when he was asked to surrender:
"Merde!"

Pfft. I could beat Godzilla. Morning Breath>Atomic Breath.

less

11-29-2005, 07:07 AM

oh... Asterix and Obelix are vikings, isn't french...

Asterix and Obelix are Galls, you ignoramus :yelling!
1.They have names ending with -ix, whereas all cartoon vikings have names ending in -nar or -rik.
2.They have wings on their helmets, whereas all cartoon vikings have horns.
3.They live in freaking France, whereas Vikings, cartoon or otherwise, lived in Scandinavia (and England, and Russia, and even Constantinopel at one point. Seriously.)

Trust the Norwegian guy on this one. Asterix and Obelix are Galls.

As for the topic, I´m still on the fence. Assuming we´re talking the "real" france, Galls excluded, both sides has a lot going for them. Throw vampiric Hitler into it, however, and the outcome should be pretty obvious.

Spacey

11-29-2005, 02:14 PM

Do I detect sarcasm here? :)

But seriosuly, France did most of the fighting for the Entente in WW1 and quite little in WW2 (some of France was even allied with Germany). Sweden wasn't officially involved in either of the wars. Sweden hasn't had any military history since the napoleonic wars.

Not completely true.. They supplied ore to germany during WW2.

Gunners

11-29-2005, 02:20 PM

What about itachi and kurenai vs france.

They infiltrate the U.S and hypnotise bush into dropping a nuke on france.:P :smile-big

Arilou

11-29-2005, 02:38 PM

Not completely true.. They supplied ore to germany during WW2.

The situation is *very* complicated, France supplied some volunteers to the Eastern Front (but no more, IIRC, than any other occupied country of comparable size) But on the other hand De Gaulle and his Free French kept fighting on the allied side for the entire war. (and was in time joined by a lot of the colonial possessions) In North Africa Vichy-french troops actually briefly resisted the american landing ("Operation Torch") But they essentially stopped fighting after few initial skirmishes and let the americans pass.

narutorulez

11-29-2005, 03:52 PM

ofcourse sasori and kimimaro would win against france!

Spacey

11-30-2005, 04:38 AM

The situation is *very* complicated, France supplied some volunteers to the Eastern Front (but no more, IIRC, than any other occupied country of comparable size) But on the other hand De Gaulle and his Free French kept fighting on the allied side for the entire war. (and was in time joined by a lot of the colonial possessions) In North Africa Vichy-french troops actually briefly resisted the american landing ("Operation Torch") But they essentially stopped fighting after few initial skirmishes and let the americans pass.

I was reffering to Sweden

Mizura

11-30-2005, 04:54 AM

France drives them insane with its heavy bureaucracy and unending paperwork! :whoo You see France starts out by surrendering, but to do that they have to go through the proper government channels and administrations. Kimimaro dies before it ever ends, Sasori either rusts before Act 1 of the surrender act gets completed or becomes insane because of amount of paperwork he's also asked to do, thus causing him to leave in agony and leaving France as the winner by default.

Or France drives them out with bad directions because of its bad English (or Japanese, whatever)

Sasori: I repeat. Where. Is. Paris.
French guy: Quoi? Je ne comprends pas.
Sasori: Paris. Paris! Where is Paris?
French guy: Pas quoi?
Sasori: *kills guy*
Deidara: Um... Now what?
Sasori: We just go that way.

*later, in Belgium*

Deidara: Um...

Yami no Takeshi

11-30-2005, 05:21 AM

Lucifer

11-30-2005, 09:37 PM

Asterix and Obelix are Galls, you ignoramus :yelling!
1.They have names ending with -ix, whereas all cartoon vikings have names ending in -nar or -rik.
2.They have wings on their helmets, whereas all cartoon vikings have horns.
3.They live in freaking France, whereas Vikings, cartoon or otherwise, lived in Scandinavia (and England, and Russia, and even Constantinopel at one point. Seriously.)

Trust the Norwegian guy on this one. Asterix and Obelix are Galls.
excuse me, you're right. I don't know much about Asterix...
well, I dislike Asterix.

Sasori: I repeat. Where. Is. Paris.
French guy: Quoi? Je ne comprends pas.
Sasori: Paris. Paris! Where is Paris?
French guy: Pas quoi?
Sasori: *kills guy*
Deidara: Um... Now what?
Sasori: We just go that way.
*LAUGHS* great. @_@.

Kichigai Kawaru

12-03-2005, 04:04 PM

No offense to the French, but YOU GUYS LOST YOUR OWN REVOLUTION.

Kichigai Kawaru

12-03-2005, 04:05 PM

P.S. Asterix and Obelix= The Shizzle

anbutofu

12-05-2005, 07:21 PM

Seriously?
France. :oh
One man with a SMG would take both out.
Or just in case a squad.
Ninja's are not faster than bullets which is exactly why Kishi did not have guns in Narutoverse.

Jokingly?
What Miz(Meh) said. :rofl

maybe if they stood still...ninjas are not faster than bullets, true, but neither are normal people, yet they seem to dodge bullets by just runnning like heck in a direction.

but the more and more i think about it. sasori and kimi would have to attack now before the muslims take over France. they would have a harder time beating french muslim's suicide attacks - bombs hurt mangas too :P

and before i get mad hate reps for being silly...i am being silly as these threads were meant to be:amuse

Zoro

12-15-2005, 06:11 PM

Zoro

12-15-2005, 06:14 PM

Jean -Marie Le Pen ressucects Hitler and take over the world(kidding).

kapsi

12-16-2005, 04:12 PM

It's not really a joke, more like an internet thing, like "lol" and "owned" abbreviations. Didn't even say it to be funny, it just had to be said. This is the internet, and a post where france fights someone. It's just traditional.
In a language you understand: it's gay.

and Leon is Italian