Waspinator
12-11-2008, 08:43 PM
Waspinator wrote a Musical about Batman!
Batman the Musical
SCENE ONE:
Curtain opens to a completely dark stage. A choir dressed in black enter. Half of them are stage left. The other stage right. Center stage should be empty. A black light hangs above Center Stage.
SONG: Origin of the Knight
Choir: In Gotham City on a dark Cold Night The Waynes saw a movie like any family might. But no one could foretell how that night went to hell.
Enter stage right to stage left THOMAS and MARTHA WAYNE. Thomas has a white rose on his jacket and Martha has incredibly white pearls. They are followed by BRUCE, a young boy. They walk toward Center stage. Coming stage right is JOE CHILL, a robber with a gun.
Choir: They walked down in an alley and encountered Joseph Chill. Demanding pearls and cash he went in for the kill.
The four people meet under the blacklight. A shot is heard. Martha and Thomas fall. Bruce lies at his fallen parents. Joe exits stage left.
Choir: Bruce Wayne was just a boy when his parents were shot, and to make it worse Chill was never caught.
Enter ALFRED PENNYWORTH stage right. He moves to center stage, with Bruce.
Choir: Left alone with Alfred, he made a solemn vow. He’ll bring them to justice and he will do it now. After years of training in the land, he is vengeance and the night for he is Batman!
Enter BATMAN.
Choir: He is Gotham’s darkest knight, the villains cower in fright turn on the signal light for Batman! They try to kill him slow, to Arkham they all go. Even Joker is too slow for Batman!
Fade to Black.
END PROLOGUE
SCENE 1
The setting is ARKHAM ASYLUM. It is the recreation area. There are Gotham City Police Officers on every corner of the stage. In center stage there are various costumed criminals.
Guard 1: Alright you whackos, you have one half hour in the recreation area. Use it wisely. Remember, if one of you crazies messes up here, all of you lose this privilege for a week. Now enjoy.
Poison Ivy: We shall Raymond. Who’s your partner?
Guard 2: I am Mitchell Barker.
Poison Ivy: New in town…
POISON IVY moves closer to Mitchell.
Poison Ivy: Why don’t I show you around? My cell is big enough for two.
Guard 1: Watch her Mitchell. She and the other crazies will kill you if you give them the chance.
Guard 2: I don’t know who all these guys are. I mean, everyone knows Joker and Two Face, but what about the guy with the dummy, or the question mark guy?
Poison Ivy: Who are we? Who are we? We are the inmates of Arkham Asylum!
SONG: The Residents of Arkham
Inmates: We are residents of Arkham, as crazy as we seem. Kill a guy, rob a bank, but we each have our own themes. We have a gimmick so you see that makes us stand in front the rest! When you see what I usually do you’ll know that I’m the best.
Poison Ivy: Look at you, so nice and lively, you been introduced to Poison Ivy. I control flora, that is plants, I can even control men using my sweet pheromones their minds do I bend.
Mr. Zazsz: See the restraints, you want to know why for I am Mr. Zazsz! See the scars that run from my feet to my hands? They each represent a victim that I killed, for deep inside me I know my mission was fulfilled.
Inmates: Their residents of Arkham, do you see what we all mean? We share no allegiance to a higher power’s team. Our gimmick lists are long and lasting continuing ever more, for every crazy in Arkham has become part of Folk Lore.
Two Face: Well I heard you’ve heard of me, but I’m not exactly what I seem. My mind’s in two, evenly split, it’s always been that way, so when you see me guns a blazing you best run away.
Scarface: Don’t you know who I am, Scarface and Ventriloquist of Arkham. He’s my dummy, I run the show for if you mess with Scarface you’ll have a death blow.
Riddler: Riddle me this, and riddle me that, who’s afraid of a big black bat. Riddle me high and riddle me low, guess how long my dance will go!
Riddler performs a tapdance number.
Inmates: We live in Arkham, but there is one we all avoid. He’ll turn the corner, kill you and say “Heavens to murgatroid!” Unpredictable, very crazy, and a cheat at even poker. We advise you to stay away from that maniac the Joker! Heed our warning very well, you poor cigarette smoker! If you had any sense at all, you’d stay away from Joker!
Guard 1: All right, very cute. Let’s move it along.
Guard 2: Hey wait, where is the Joker?
Guard 1: He is in the television room with his girlfriend. Don’t worry Mitch, he’s being guarded. There is no way he can do anything.
Poison Ivy: Are you sure about that honey?
Guard 1: For Gotham’s sake, I hope so.
END SCENE
SCENE 2
Scene: Television Room. A couch (or some chairs) is in the middle of the stage. Besides the various guards, there are two other occupants in the room. They are THE JOKER, a white skinned terror with green hair, red lips, and a giant grin, and HARLEY QUINN, a blonde haired woman who is completely smitten with the Joker.
Joker: Did you hear something outside Harley?
Harley: I think I heard them saying something about a toker or something Puddin!
Joker: Poor girl. Cant understand the lyrics for anything. No you idiot, it was an invitation!
Harley: An invitation?
Joker: Quite right Pooh! It was a challenge to outdo myself in the most spectacular way possible! But how?
Harley: The laughing fish bit?
Joker: Hello! The keyword was “outdo!” Something new! Original! Yes the Laughing Fish was fine back in the day, but that’s to be expected!
Harley: Well what are you gonna do Puddin?
Joker: THAT’S WHAt I’m THINKING OF YOU NITWIT! (Hits her) Wait…I got it! Oh this will be spectacular! HAHAHAHAHA!
Harley: What’s the plan Mistah J?
Joker: I think in order to keep up with Pammy’s little song outside I shall join in on my own little ditty. Hit it Maestro!
SONG: Light up the Town
Joker: How often do I, the Clown Prince of Crime think of a brilliant plan?
Harley: All the time my big man!
Joker: And how many times do they work my sweet?
Harley: Um..I can count them on the toes on my feet!
Joker: Well this one Pooh will blow them all away, so take a listen to what I have to say. It is time to Light up the town!
Harley: Light up the town?
Joker: Light up the town! Turn their frowns upside down.
Harley: But how will ya do it?
Joker: My laughing gas will do the job well, it’ll have them laughing straight to Hell! Then out from the night will come dear Batsy, try as he might he’ll never catch me. For I am the Clown Prince of Crime. Gotham City is mine!
Harley: But we gotta get out of the Nut house first Mista J!
Joker: Quite right! But don’t you worry Harley Quinn, I know exactly where to begin. For half these guards are my men, now take em out boys! This is the end for them!
The guards proceed to shoot each other, not knowing which guard worked for which.
Harley: Puddin, they are all dead!
Joker: Well I lied. None of them were my men. Let us go Light up the town!
Harley: Light up the Town!
Joker: My laughing gas will do the job well for sending Batman straight to hell! For you see I am the man, and now let us start my master plan!
The Joker looks around. He goes to the guard closest to him and takes a set of keys.
Joker: Well that was fun. Who’s up for Chinese?
The Joker and Harley exit stage right. As he leaves, the Joker laughs. The laugh continues even as the curtain is closed.
END SCENE
SCENE 3
The setting is the Batcave. A computer should be in the corner of the stage. Alone at the computer is BRUCE WAYNE.
Bruce: So he escaped again.
Entering upper stage left is ALFRED. He is carrying a sandwich.
Alfred: Who escaped sir?
Bruce: Joker and Harley Quinn. The security at Arkham is pathetic. The place is a revolving door for them!
Alfred: Sir, may I persuade you to calm down and eat? You haven’t slept in a week and your food intake is most unhealthy.
Bruce: Fine Alfred.
Alfred: So Master Bruce, how will you approach this new development.
Bruce: The same way I do every time one of them escape, I patrol the city until either I find them or they find me.
Alfred: Sir, if I may, the Bat Computer is blinking. Dare I assume that means Commissioner Gordon has lit the Bat Signal.
Bruce: So it seems Alfred. Let me suit up and head over to the Gotham Police Building.
Alfred: Um…sir?
Bruce: Yes?
Alfred: Your sandwich sir.
Bruce: (Sigh) If it wasn’t for you I’d die of starvation.
Alfred: I’d like to think that of myself from time to time Master Bruce.
Bruce exits stage right to get changed into the costume.
Alfred: Master Bruce is working himself to death. I do pray he returns home fine.
Song: Do Take Care
Alfred: The innocence was lost some time ago, the Master Bruce I knew then was lost although I still know he’s ready to get things done, sending his villains on the run, but I sigh.
Alfred sits down at the chair.
Alfred: Do take care Master Bruce hear my prayer. My doctoring skills cannot be here and there! Do not stress yourself too much, oh can you hear me now? I wish you were safe and sound. Night after night you take up your solemn vow. You strike terror in your foes, and then you show them how you deal with the scum on these Gotham streets but your track record is excellent so few major defeats. But even then you come back changed, cold, and self contained, you keep all of your pain pent up inside you brain. But I will be here for you, until I go and die, but until that day I shall remain and in the dark I’ll cry “Do take car Master Bruce hear my prayer! My medical skills cannot be here and there! Do not stress yourself too much, oh can you hear me now? I hope you are safe and sound.”
Alfred gets up and walks toward stage left.
Alfred: Do take Care.
Alfred exits stage left.
END SCENE
Batman the Musical
SCENE ONE:
Curtain opens to a completely dark stage. A choir dressed in black enter. Half of them are stage left. The other stage right. Center stage should be empty. A black light hangs above Center Stage.
SONG: Origin of the Knight
Choir: In Gotham City on a dark Cold Night The Waynes saw a movie like any family might. But no one could foretell how that night went to hell.
Enter stage right to stage left THOMAS and MARTHA WAYNE. Thomas has a white rose on his jacket and Martha has incredibly white pearls. They are followed by BRUCE, a young boy. They walk toward Center stage. Coming stage right is JOE CHILL, a robber with a gun.
Choir: They walked down in an alley and encountered Joseph Chill. Demanding pearls and cash he went in for the kill.
The four people meet under the blacklight. A shot is heard. Martha and Thomas fall. Bruce lies at his fallen parents. Joe exits stage left.
Choir: Bruce Wayne was just a boy when his parents were shot, and to make it worse Chill was never caught.
Enter ALFRED PENNYWORTH stage right. He moves to center stage, with Bruce.
Choir: Left alone with Alfred, he made a solemn vow. He’ll bring them to justice and he will do it now. After years of training in the land, he is vengeance and the night for he is Batman!
Enter BATMAN.
Choir: He is Gotham’s darkest knight, the villains cower in fright turn on the signal light for Batman! They try to kill him slow, to Arkham they all go. Even Joker is too slow for Batman!
Fade to Black.
END PROLOGUE
SCENE 1
The setting is ARKHAM ASYLUM. It is the recreation area. There are Gotham City Police Officers on every corner of the stage. In center stage there are various costumed criminals.
Guard 1: Alright you whackos, you have one half hour in the recreation area. Use it wisely. Remember, if one of you crazies messes up here, all of you lose this privilege for a week. Now enjoy.
Poison Ivy: We shall Raymond. Who’s your partner?
Guard 2: I am Mitchell Barker.
Poison Ivy: New in town…
POISON IVY moves closer to Mitchell.
Poison Ivy: Why don’t I show you around? My cell is big enough for two.
Guard 1: Watch her Mitchell. She and the other crazies will kill you if you give them the chance.
Guard 2: I don’t know who all these guys are. I mean, everyone knows Joker and Two Face, but what about the guy with the dummy, or the question mark guy?
Poison Ivy: Who are we? Who are we? We are the inmates of Arkham Asylum!
SONG: The Residents of Arkham
Inmates: We are residents of Arkham, as crazy as we seem. Kill a guy, rob a bank, but we each have our own themes. We have a gimmick so you see that makes us stand in front the rest! When you see what I usually do you’ll know that I’m the best.
Poison Ivy: Look at you, so nice and lively, you been introduced to Poison Ivy. I control flora, that is plants, I can even control men using my sweet pheromones their minds do I bend.
Mr. Zazsz: See the restraints, you want to know why for I am Mr. Zazsz! See the scars that run from my feet to my hands? They each represent a victim that I killed, for deep inside me I know my mission was fulfilled.
Inmates: Their residents of Arkham, do you see what we all mean? We share no allegiance to a higher power’s team. Our gimmick lists are long and lasting continuing ever more, for every crazy in Arkham has become part of Folk Lore.
Two Face: Well I heard you’ve heard of me, but I’m not exactly what I seem. My mind’s in two, evenly split, it’s always been that way, so when you see me guns a blazing you best run away.
Scarface: Don’t you know who I am, Scarface and Ventriloquist of Arkham. He’s my dummy, I run the show for if you mess with Scarface you’ll have a death blow.
Riddler: Riddle me this, and riddle me that, who’s afraid of a big black bat. Riddle me high and riddle me low, guess how long my dance will go!
Riddler performs a tapdance number.
Inmates: We live in Arkham, but there is one we all avoid. He’ll turn the corner, kill you and say “Heavens to murgatroid!” Unpredictable, very crazy, and a cheat at even poker. We advise you to stay away from that maniac the Joker! Heed our warning very well, you poor cigarette smoker! If you had any sense at all, you’d stay away from Joker!
Guard 1: All right, very cute. Let’s move it along.
Guard 2: Hey wait, where is the Joker?
Guard 1: He is in the television room with his girlfriend. Don’t worry Mitch, he’s being guarded. There is no way he can do anything.
Poison Ivy: Are you sure about that honey?
Guard 1: For Gotham’s sake, I hope so.
END SCENE
SCENE 2
Scene: Television Room. A couch (or some chairs) is in the middle of the stage. Besides the various guards, there are two other occupants in the room. They are THE JOKER, a white skinned terror with green hair, red lips, and a giant grin, and HARLEY QUINN, a blonde haired woman who is completely smitten with the Joker.
Joker: Did you hear something outside Harley?
Harley: I think I heard them saying something about a toker or something Puddin!
Joker: Poor girl. Cant understand the lyrics for anything. No you idiot, it was an invitation!
Harley: An invitation?
Joker: Quite right Pooh! It was a challenge to outdo myself in the most spectacular way possible! But how?
Harley: The laughing fish bit?
Joker: Hello! The keyword was “outdo!” Something new! Original! Yes the Laughing Fish was fine back in the day, but that’s to be expected!
Harley: Well what are you gonna do Puddin?
Joker: THAT’S WHAt I’m THINKING OF YOU NITWIT! (Hits her) Wait…I got it! Oh this will be spectacular! HAHAHAHAHA!
Harley: What’s the plan Mistah J?
Joker: I think in order to keep up with Pammy’s little song outside I shall join in on my own little ditty. Hit it Maestro!
SONG: Light up the Town
Joker: How often do I, the Clown Prince of Crime think of a brilliant plan?
Harley: All the time my big man!
Joker: And how many times do they work my sweet?
Harley: Um..I can count them on the toes on my feet!
Joker: Well this one Pooh will blow them all away, so take a listen to what I have to say. It is time to Light up the town!
Harley: Light up the town?
Joker: Light up the town! Turn their frowns upside down.
Harley: But how will ya do it?
Joker: My laughing gas will do the job well, it’ll have them laughing straight to Hell! Then out from the night will come dear Batsy, try as he might he’ll never catch me. For I am the Clown Prince of Crime. Gotham City is mine!
Harley: But we gotta get out of the Nut house first Mista J!
Joker: Quite right! But don’t you worry Harley Quinn, I know exactly where to begin. For half these guards are my men, now take em out boys! This is the end for them!
The guards proceed to shoot each other, not knowing which guard worked for which.
Harley: Puddin, they are all dead!
Joker: Well I lied. None of them were my men. Let us go Light up the town!
Harley: Light up the Town!
Joker: My laughing gas will do the job well for sending Batman straight to hell! For you see I am the man, and now let us start my master plan!
The Joker looks around. He goes to the guard closest to him and takes a set of keys.
Joker: Well that was fun. Who’s up for Chinese?
The Joker and Harley exit stage right. As he leaves, the Joker laughs. The laugh continues even as the curtain is closed.
END SCENE
SCENE 3
The setting is the Batcave. A computer should be in the corner of the stage. Alone at the computer is BRUCE WAYNE.
Bruce: So he escaped again.
Entering upper stage left is ALFRED. He is carrying a sandwich.
Alfred: Who escaped sir?
Bruce: Joker and Harley Quinn. The security at Arkham is pathetic. The place is a revolving door for them!
Alfred: Sir, may I persuade you to calm down and eat? You haven’t slept in a week and your food intake is most unhealthy.
Bruce: Fine Alfred.
Alfred: So Master Bruce, how will you approach this new development.
Bruce: The same way I do every time one of them escape, I patrol the city until either I find them or they find me.
Alfred: Sir, if I may, the Bat Computer is blinking. Dare I assume that means Commissioner Gordon has lit the Bat Signal.
Bruce: So it seems Alfred. Let me suit up and head over to the Gotham Police Building.
Alfred: Um…sir?
Bruce: Yes?
Alfred: Your sandwich sir.
Bruce: (Sigh) If it wasn’t for you I’d die of starvation.
Alfred: I’d like to think that of myself from time to time Master Bruce.
Bruce exits stage right to get changed into the costume.
Alfred: Master Bruce is working himself to death. I do pray he returns home fine.
Song: Do Take Care
Alfred: The innocence was lost some time ago, the Master Bruce I knew then was lost although I still know he’s ready to get things done, sending his villains on the run, but I sigh.
Alfred sits down at the chair.
Alfred: Do take care Master Bruce hear my prayer. My doctoring skills cannot be here and there! Do not stress yourself too much, oh can you hear me now? I wish you were safe and sound. Night after night you take up your solemn vow. You strike terror in your foes, and then you show them how you deal with the scum on these Gotham streets but your track record is excellent so few major defeats. But even then you come back changed, cold, and self contained, you keep all of your pain pent up inside you brain. But I will be here for you, until I go and die, but until that day I shall remain and in the dark I’ll cry “Do take car Master Bruce hear my prayer! My medical skills cannot be here and there! Do not stress yourself too much, oh can you hear me now? I hope you are safe and sound.”
Alfred gets up and walks toward stage left.
Alfred: Do take Care.
Alfred exits stage left.
END SCENE