Naminé
11-16-2007, 05:17 AM
Hello there all, I just finished my first novel, Black Cross, and I am very happy with it. I will be posting it on Fanfic.net sometime soon... and possible here?
I think that I will make a sequel to Black Cross... but not sometime very soon.
I am now working on a whole different novel, whole different story, and I just wanted to get some opinions from fellow members. :amuse Any criticism/comments are welcome towards helping me construct my story.
What is it about?
Hikari is late for school when her dog, Aziu, gets loose and runs away. She follows him into a long, twisting pass through Sakura trees which lead her to a small cottage. She walks into it and does not find her dog. Hikari, being extremely curious, opens one of the drawers and reads letters of some sort. Not interested, she turns around to see something covered with a dry blanket. She takes the blanket off hastily and soon finds that she is looking into a mirror. Hikari feels dragged in by a force that leads her to touch the mirror with her index finger. She soon finds that the mirror makes ripples. She then falls into it, leading her into a whole different dimension where she meets a boy named Shenjii. The people in this world look nothing like she has ever seen before.
Hikari soon finds that Shenjii's sister, Eizou, has died the same day that Hikari has been born, thus, making Hikari a reincarnation of Eizou. Half of Eizou's soul is in Hikari, and the other half remains wandering forever in the House of Mirrors... a maze filled with winding twists. Shenjii and Hikari must free the other half of Eizou's soul, but they cannot get into he house of mirrors without a special key that Hikari had read about in a letter earlier in the small cottage. They must retrieve that letter, with the help of Shenjii and Eizou's uncle, Professor Mishumo.
Hikari can meet and talk with Eizou through her reflection in the mirror. When she looks into a mirror in this new dimension she is in, she is met by Eizou's image... which closely relates to hers.
The same words keep ringing in Hikari's head... "Your next move into the maze, could be your last."
Who are the characters?
Kuragari Hikari: Hikari is the main character, and is fourteen years old. She has an odd household name to go along with her name. Her household name relates to darkness, when her name means light. Hikari is not a whole person, because she is a simple reincarnation of a magical being named Eizou. By having Eizou reincarnate herself into Hikari, Hikari gets a bit of Eizou's special abilities as well... and must develop them.
Hikari has long black hair that reaches to her lower back. Her eyes are a deep amber color. Hikari wears her school uniform but soon changes into Eizou's old white Kimono with intricate red designs to help better conceil herself so that the other people in this dimension will not think of her as a human... because they can smell the blood of a human being. Her blood, being mixed with Eizou's, also helps better conceil her identity.
Hikari is at first scared and refuses to go look for Eizou, but knowing that it is her destiny to find the other half of her soul, and that she is not complete, she learns that she must.
Shenjii: Shenjii is a sort of mysterious character that is seventeen years old. He has grey hair that reaches to his mid-back and is tied up in a ponytail. He wears a black robe and has shapeshifting abilities which allow him to transform into the twelve animals of the zodiac, with each animal having a special ability. Shenjii does not call Hikari by her name, he calls her Umarekawari-Chan. He has no respect for Hikari and tends to treat her only as an easy way to get his sister out of the House of Mirrors. He treats her as any other person in this dimension would treat her, as a human. Hikari and him tend to argue alot, and most of the arguments are quite funny. Aziu, Hikari's pet dog, was actually Shenjii all of this time, undercover as a dog which he has shapeshifted into. By running away, in the form of an innocent puppy, he led Hikari to the cottage, and ino the mirror that led her into the other dimension.
Proffesor Mishumo: A crackpot scientist who has a wide knowledge of herbs and medicines, and is Eizou and Shenjii's uncle. He use to work as an apothecary but now does research in helping Hikari and Shenjii release Eizou's soul from it's prison. Professor Mishumo use to research on earth, in the cottage where Hikari had once been in. He regrets not taking the letters with him into the dimension, because they construct a puzzle to the secrets and mysteries of the house of mirrors. He has a white goatee and has grayish-white hair that falls onto his shoulders.
Tsubasa: Tsubasa is a female samurai that has a long sword. Tsubasa is sixteen years old. She is inlove with Shenjii, who shows no inention of being in a relationship. She only agrees to join Hikari and the others in their search for Eizou so that she can be closer to Shenjii, but realises that this is not an honorable thing to do, and then focuses on helping find Eizou. She has a fiery attitude and a somewhat perky nature whenever talking to Shenjii where she confuses her words. Tsubasa is sort of the humourous character in the story, and serves as comic relief. She has short, brown hair an extremely thin braid that reaches to her ankles.
Eizou: Eizou is the same age as Hikari and closely resembles her looks. She has a different eye color from Hikari. Eizou's reflection is a crystal blue. Her hair is exactly like Hikar's hair. Eizou is a quiet character that has a soft, warm voice. Hikari always goes to Eizou for guidance by talking to her through a mirror. Hikari and Eizou have a deep connection with eachother. Eizou is a gentle character who's soul is forever wandering in the House of Mirrors, due to a banishment fourteen years ago when Eizou fell inlove with a human, and death was her punishment. She was able to somehow reincarnate half of her soul into the next baby being born on earth at that second, who was Hikari. The other half of her soul was sucked into the house of mirrors, where she hopes that Shenjii will find Hikari, and release her from her prison. She can meet with Hikari whenever Hikari looks into a mirror. If Hikari dies, then they cannot be in contact with Eizou and half of Eizou's soul will dissapear from existence. That is why Shenjii must constantly protect Hikari from anything trying to rid of her, much like the council of the dimnesion, who are well aware that Hikari is a human, and that they plan on retrieving.
So... this story is pretty much a twisted version of Alice in Wonderland, don't you think?
I already started this story and have completed 17 pages... [not like it's contender, Black Cross, in which i had made 250 pages]
So... what are your comments, ideas, criticism... anything will do to help out. smile-big
I think that I will make a sequel to Black Cross... but not sometime very soon.
I am now working on a whole different novel, whole different story, and I just wanted to get some opinions from fellow members. :amuse Any criticism/comments are welcome towards helping me construct my story.
What is it about?
Hikari is late for school when her dog, Aziu, gets loose and runs away. She follows him into a long, twisting pass through Sakura trees which lead her to a small cottage. She walks into it and does not find her dog. Hikari, being extremely curious, opens one of the drawers and reads letters of some sort. Not interested, she turns around to see something covered with a dry blanket. She takes the blanket off hastily and soon finds that she is looking into a mirror. Hikari feels dragged in by a force that leads her to touch the mirror with her index finger. She soon finds that the mirror makes ripples. She then falls into it, leading her into a whole different dimension where she meets a boy named Shenjii. The people in this world look nothing like she has ever seen before.
Hikari soon finds that Shenjii's sister, Eizou, has died the same day that Hikari has been born, thus, making Hikari a reincarnation of Eizou. Half of Eizou's soul is in Hikari, and the other half remains wandering forever in the House of Mirrors... a maze filled with winding twists. Shenjii and Hikari must free the other half of Eizou's soul, but they cannot get into he house of mirrors without a special key that Hikari had read about in a letter earlier in the small cottage. They must retrieve that letter, with the help of Shenjii and Eizou's uncle, Professor Mishumo.
Hikari can meet and talk with Eizou through her reflection in the mirror. When she looks into a mirror in this new dimension she is in, she is met by Eizou's image... which closely relates to hers.
The same words keep ringing in Hikari's head... "Your next move into the maze, could be your last."
Who are the characters?
Kuragari Hikari: Hikari is the main character, and is fourteen years old. She has an odd household name to go along with her name. Her household name relates to darkness, when her name means light. Hikari is not a whole person, because she is a simple reincarnation of a magical being named Eizou. By having Eizou reincarnate herself into Hikari, Hikari gets a bit of Eizou's special abilities as well... and must develop them.
Hikari has long black hair that reaches to her lower back. Her eyes are a deep amber color. Hikari wears her school uniform but soon changes into Eizou's old white Kimono with intricate red designs to help better conceil herself so that the other people in this dimension will not think of her as a human... because they can smell the blood of a human being. Her blood, being mixed with Eizou's, also helps better conceil her identity.
Hikari is at first scared and refuses to go look for Eizou, but knowing that it is her destiny to find the other half of her soul, and that she is not complete, she learns that she must.
Shenjii: Shenjii is a sort of mysterious character that is seventeen years old. He has grey hair that reaches to his mid-back and is tied up in a ponytail. He wears a black robe and has shapeshifting abilities which allow him to transform into the twelve animals of the zodiac, with each animal having a special ability. Shenjii does not call Hikari by her name, he calls her Umarekawari-Chan. He has no respect for Hikari and tends to treat her only as an easy way to get his sister out of the House of Mirrors. He treats her as any other person in this dimension would treat her, as a human. Hikari and him tend to argue alot, and most of the arguments are quite funny. Aziu, Hikari's pet dog, was actually Shenjii all of this time, undercover as a dog which he has shapeshifted into. By running away, in the form of an innocent puppy, he led Hikari to the cottage, and ino the mirror that led her into the other dimension.
Proffesor Mishumo: A crackpot scientist who has a wide knowledge of herbs and medicines, and is Eizou and Shenjii's uncle. He use to work as an apothecary but now does research in helping Hikari and Shenjii release Eizou's soul from it's prison. Professor Mishumo use to research on earth, in the cottage where Hikari had once been in. He regrets not taking the letters with him into the dimension, because they construct a puzzle to the secrets and mysteries of the house of mirrors. He has a white goatee and has grayish-white hair that falls onto his shoulders.
Tsubasa: Tsubasa is a female samurai that has a long sword. Tsubasa is sixteen years old. She is inlove with Shenjii, who shows no inention of being in a relationship. She only agrees to join Hikari and the others in their search for Eizou so that she can be closer to Shenjii, but realises that this is not an honorable thing to do, and then focuses on helping find Eizou. She has a fiery attitude and a somewhat perky nature whenever talking to Shenjii where she confuses her words. Tsubasa is sort of the humourous character in the story, and serves as comic relief. She has short, brown hair an extremely thin braid that reaches to her ankles.
Eizou: Eizou is the same age as Hikari and closely resembles her looks. She has a different eye color from Hikari. Eizou's reflection is a crystal blue. Her hair is exactly like Hikar's hair. Eizou is a quiet character that has a soft, warm voice. Hikari always goes to Eizou for guidance by talking to her through a mirror. Hikari and Eizou have a deep connection with eachother. Eizou is a gentle character who's soul is forever wandering in the House of Mirrors, due to a banishment fourteen years ago when Eizou fell inlove with a human, and death was her punishment. She was able to somehow reincarnate half of her soul into the next baby being born on earth at that second, who was Hikari. The other half of her soul was sucked into the house of mirrors, where she hopes that Shenjii will find Hikari, and release her from her prison. She can meet with Hikari whenever Hikari looks into a mirror. If Hikari dies, then they cannot be in contact with Eizou and half of Eizou's soul will dissapear from existence. That is why Shenjii must constantly protect Hikari from anything trying to rid of her, much like the council of the dimnesion, who are well aware that Hikari is a human, and that they plan on retrieving.
So... this story is pretty much a twisted version of Alice in Wonderland, don't you think?
I already started this story and have completed 17 pages... [not like it's contender, Black Cross, in which i had made 250 pages]
So... what are your comments, ideas, criticism... anything will do to help out. smile-big